I'm not dead yet

So even though I haven't posted anything in forever, I'm still alive. And I've signed up for Cannonball Read III, so I'll have at least 52 more posts over the next 12 months.

I've kind of gotten out of the reading state of mind (damn you Netflix Instant Watch!), so this is a good way to get back into that. Although I'm totally going to be tempted to buy lots of new books instead of going to the library, I'll try to refrain.

Take your head out of your ass buddy

Here's a thought for Mark Williams, the leader of the 'tea-party' movement - you're upset at President Obama for not embracing the whole country, correct? Maybe you're correct. But I think Obama will embrace the whole country the same time you do. I know that for you 'whole country' means rich white men, but to the rest of us it means everyone else. So when you start including them, maybe you'll get a bit more support (or maybe not since you're obviously a lunatic).

'Tea Party' Leader Melts Down On CNN

And here's a thought for Kanye West - you should have realized you did something wrong before you handed back the mike. In fact you should never have jumped up on the stage in the first place. No one cares who you think should have won. Your opinion is not the be-all-end-all. What the hell is wrong with you? If someone did that to you, you would have lost your shit. Get some fucking manners, Kanye.

Just NO

I think it's possible my brain just exploded - Cheney for President, Wall St Journal Op-Ed says.

Don't even fucking joke about that. What if you give them ideas? Let's file that under the worst idea of the century. No, the millennium. There's nothing that could happen in the next thousand years that would be a worse idea than that. I joked about leaving the country when Bush was reelected, and how I would have to if McCain was elected, but if that happened I would be fucking gone. I think I might have nightmares tonight. Forget Darth Vader comparisons (although the barely alive, sustained by machine thing is apt), he's like fucking Palpatine. Pure evil. Can we say the end of life as we know it?

R.I.P.

Can we put a limit on the celebrity deaths? This whole two in one day thing is starting to get really depressing.

Kennedy Dead At 77 (The Boston Globes obit)

Dominick Dunne Dead At 83 (Huffington Post)

I didn't really know anything about Ted Kennedy, aside from the whole Chappaquiddick thing. He's just someone that was always there. It's a bit odd to think that there is no longer a Kennedy in the
Senate (there's not is there? I'm not really up on Massachusetts politics). It feels like the end of an era. After reading everyone's thoughts today, I can say he definitely accomplished a lot as a Senator. I believe that you can still think that he was kind of a dick in his personal life, what with the drinking and whoring around and being a murder suspect, but that it's possible to still admire everything that he did away from all that, in his professional life. And I admire anyone who dedicates their entire life to a cause, and to champion tirelessly to ensure that people that are less fortunate have a better life. So, well played your whole professional life Ted Kennedy. I can honestly say that I don't think there will be another one like you.

*Cartoon belongs to creator Jeff Danziger.

Even I know that

Driving home from work yesterday I was behind a little old lady in a Caddy. She was going slow and there was traffic so I couldn't pass her. Therefore, I had plenty of time to study her bumper sticker -

Trust God's mother

Pray the rosary

Now, the only reason I have retained any knowledge of Catholicism is for mocking purposes (which this totally fits), but even I know that GOD DOESN'T HAVE A MOTHER. Get your fucking religion straight lady. Your bumper sticker should say 'Trust Jesus' mother'. How did this escape your notice? Also the notice of the people who made the bumper sticker, but maybe they were just fucking with you.

Continuing in my afternoon drive of weirdness, I stopped to get a sandwich and there were these two teenage girls in the parking lot sitting in a wee little cart, pulled by the tiniest pony I have ever seen. When they pulled into a space, the cart and pony took up less than half the parking space. And they were just riding around the parking lot and pulling into random spaces. WTF?

I'm going to have to move

Really, Arnold Schwarzenegger? You don't think that this is the worst idea in the history of EVER? Cutting all state funding for domestic violence? On top of all the education cuts?

You have children. Don't you want them to have a good education? Oh wait, they probably don't go to a public school. And if they do, it's certainly not going to be in an area where the education cuts have caused the layoffs of 600 teachers. IN ONE AREA. What the hell are you thinking? California already has one of the worst education systems in the country. So naturally, giving less money to education is real wise choice.

Also, you have DAUGHTERS. As much as you don't even want to imagine them being in a situation where they would need a shelter for battered women, wouldn't you want everything possible available to them? The women who find themselves in need of those shelters are all someone's daughter. And cutting funding, and possibly causing a lot of shelters to close, will give I-don't-even-know-how-many women no place to turn. And then they will find themselves trapped in abusive relationships. So I think that you're no better than the men that are hitting these women. And maybe that's a bit harsh, but this really pisses me off.

GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY STATE.

Sometimes Chinese Food and Donut places make perfect sense to me. Other times they seem like the most bizarre thing ever. I do know that they have pretty fucking good donuts.

When I have a few extra minutes in the morning, and no food in my locker at work, I always stop by the one in town and get something for breakfast. Lately I've been getting apple fritters. And now I'm totally craving a donut something fierce. Guess I'll have to leave a little early tomorrow morning.

Don't you want me baby?

I'm having more fun than I should watching VH1's 100 Greatest One Hit Wonders Of The 80s.

Vacation All I Ever Wanted

For some reason I've been getting a ton of spam recently. Step up your game with the spam filters Comcast. Seriously. Anyway, one of the messages was for a vacation in....wait for it.....Branson, Missouri. And just the other day, while I was watching a 48 Hours Investigates marathon (do not mock my love of true crime) on TLC, there was like, 3 commercials each hour for Branson, Missouri. Is this a hot new vacation spot? I could see NYC, or SF or Miami. Someplace along those lines. But Missouri? I'm confused.

Also, I did see Virginia Madsen shilling for Botox and I was saddened. In case you didn't know, Botox touts 'flexibility'. Considering every person I've seen on tv with Botox has the most inflexible, unmoving face possible, I think we all know what a joke that is.

I know you can be overwhelmed, and you can be underwhelmed, but can you ever just be whelmed?

It's possible that if I don't get a massage soon I may cry.

In other news.....nope. I got nothin' else. It's possible I'm incredibly boring. Haven't really been doing much of anything lately, except going to wedding showers (hate) and weddings. Thank god that's over. I will be going to Disneyland in a few weeks. Which is Yay!Fun! but we'll be there on the last Friday of spring break. So it's possible I will have killed someone before the day is over. Cross your fingers I don't end up in jail.

Poor Jimmy Carter. No one wants to stand very close to him :( Everyone else is so close they're practically touching, and he's off to the side, gazing wistfully at 'the cool kids'. He can console himself with the fact that really only one of them falls into that category. One is half-way there, and the other two are in no way included in that group.

"I don't have any idea."

--Dick Cheney, on why he has such low approval ratings

I know this quote is a few days old, but it makes me laugh/twitch in horror every time I see it. Seriously, Dick? No idea? Might it have something to do with the fact that you are pure evil and will never die? I think maybe so.

Contrary to how it may seem from the entries in this blog, I'm not actually all about politics. However, these days there is just so much that's popping up I can't help but talk about it. Or maybe I'm just paying more attention. Who knows?

The 'Right to Conscience' regulation has me all up in arms. Seriously?!? I can't even begin to express how wrong I  think this is. And I work in the healthcare industry. The nice thing about being a raging liberal, I suppose, is the fact that I have no issues with any medical procedures. I do think plastic surgery for vanity is stupid and not something I'd ever do, but would I refuse to schedule (I'm a surgery scheduler, fyi) that for someone? Absolutely not. It's their body and they can do whatever they want with it, regardless of what I think. If you have a problem with LEGAL medical procedures/treatments/prescriptions, don't be a fucking doctor. Or nurse, or pharmacist. Whatever spot you have in healthcare, get the hell out. 

On Rachel Maddow, she brought up the fact that this doesn't just effect birth control/abortions. If a pharmacist or pharmacy technician is a Christian Scientist, for example, and doesn't agree with antibiotics for children, then they can refuse to fill your prescription. And while I wonder while someone so opposed to basic medical treatment would be in that job, it still is a terrifying thought. Not only that, but the regulation is vague enough that it can apply to anyone that is involved in the process. If the cashier ringing up your purchase doesn't agree, they can refuse to sell to you. Believe whatever you want to believe, but don't force it on other people. If you don't believe in birth control, then don't take it. But don't tell me that I can't take it. In no way does anyone else have control over what I put into my body. Especially a legal prescription.

Full disclosure: The hospital I work for is run by nuns and as such, abortions are not performed there as an elective procedure. In no way do I agree with the practice of banning procedures, but a job is a job. And even though I don't agree with it, although not for religious purposes, I still do the job.

Sometimes, other people say it best. From 'The West Wing', season 4 episode 9 (emphasis mine):

BARTLET: The only doctor available won't do it.

ABBEY: He's Jewish?

BARTLET: Persian.
ABBEY: He doesn't have a choice.
BARTLET: Abbey...
ABBEY: He doesn't. Doctors aren't instruments of the state, and they're not allowed to choose patients on spec.
BARTLET: I can't order him to do it.
ABBEY: Yes, you can.
BARTLET: Through the power vested in me by you?
ABBEY: Samuel Mudd set Booth's leg after he shot Lincoln. Doctors are liable in this country if they don't treat the patient right in front of them.
BARTLET: Just for the record, this is why we don't talk about foreign policy. Which we do, and you don't think we do it enough.
ABBEY: Why?
BARTLET: Because Samuel Mudd was tried and convicted of treason for setting that leg.
ABBEY: So?
BARTLET: What 'so'?
ABBEY: So that's the way it goes. You set the leg.
BARTLET: The patient right in front of them?
ABBEY: Yes.

P.S. Dear Blogger - why the hell won't you upload this post with a picture? Or links? Is this some sort of commentary on pro-choice?

Are pigs flying?

It's like I don't even know who I am anymore. Newt Gingrich Rips RNC.

I am clearly the laziest blogger ever, what with the never updating. But today I had something to say.

So I was reading an article over at Newsweek re:gay marriage and the bible/religion. It's basically a really long version of President Bartlet's speech from 'The West Wing'. You know, along the lines of how Leviticus has all kinds of outdated rules and they don't fit into modern society. That sort of thing. I've heard it a million times since then, but it's still a valid point. I just kind of wish people would get it already, so we can hear a new argument.

Anyhoo, that's totally not the point of this post. While reading that article, I can across this sentence - "...and by the 1970s most states had gotten rid of their "head and master" laws, which gave husbands the right to decide where a family would live and whether a wife would be able to take a job." MOST states?!? MOST?!? I'm terrified at the implication that there were states that kept that as a law. Also at the implication that there are possibly still states that have law. At least, that is the impression I was left with after reading that.

Also, I really really really wish that more people would be talking about separation of church and state. It's all well and good for Jack Black to sing about it, but I think it needs to be said in a more serious tone. The church (any church) can define marriage however they want, but that shouldn't be standard that's legally enforced on everyone. It's something that should only apply to the people who follow that religion/belief system. I read somewhere, and I totally forgot where, that every couple should just have civil unions in the eyes of the law. Gay, straight, whatever. And then if they would like have some sort of religious ceremony, that would be up to their church as to whether or not it's acceptable. And the more I think about it, the better it sounds.

In this same vein (of separation, not marriage) I saw this quote from Bill O'Reilly on The Daily Beast today - “If you can get religion out,” Bill O’Reilly warned, “then you can pass secular progressive programs, like legalization of narcotics, euthanasia, abortion at will, gay marriage.” Umm......NO. Religion should have no bearing against these things. Maybe I'm just not paying attention, but I seem to hear all these crazy right-wing nutjobs spouting off all kinds of shit like that, but I don't really hear anyone stepping up and saying 'hey separation of church and state, pal'. My hope is that people are saying that, and I'm just looking in the wrong places. Also I really hate to quote Bill O'Reilly, because repeating anything that comes out of his mouth means someone was paying attention.

Shame

Sometimes, I'm absolutely ashamed to be American. Or maybe even human. I've spent all day trying to sum up how I feel about this and I can't. I literally cannot find the words to express how this sickens me. 

It's not even so much that the candidates did nothing about it (I might even be willing to cut them some slack and say they didn't hear), but the fact that people felt that it was okay, in 2008, to behave like this. All I really can say is that there is no way in hell I would ever vote for someone who has the support of that kind of person. 

And look at that. I managed to have an opposite opinion and express it without resorting to threats of violence and slander. Imagine.